Behind the Scenes: Home

Finding God's finger prints in the dark

The Book Journey

I have never been an avid book reader, but God has called it out of me. Now in my 40’s, I am always searching for the next book he has for me around the corner. My most recent book was a gift through one of my classes at church. I felt like a 2-year-old on Christmas day. So I’ve decided to share my walk with God through the books with all of you.

The first time I opened a book with Jesus, it was The Bible

The first time I opened a book with Jesus, it was The Bible—the book of Esther, to be exact.
The Bible you see before you was not obtained by purchasing it at a store. It was obtained by the “Mother Bear” rising up in one beautiful sister of mine. This very Bible belonged to my grandmother, and then to my mother. After her death, my sister was determined it was mine. Bless her soul.
Six months later, I would be at a park in Houston, Texas, when I opened it for the first time.
What was my first reaction to the Bible, you ask?
After I finished—in one sitting—I was covered in joy and excitement. I called my sister, overflowing with emotion. I couldn’t even articulate what I was feeling.
And today, I still am at a loss for words worthy of the experience.
You might have noticed all my beautiful post-its sticking out from the sides.
Each one of those signifies a time the Bible has spoken directly into my life.
Since that day in 2022, I’ve read all of five books in the Bible. The Lord even sent me back through one a second time—and I received a completely different message.
Now, I’m walking my way through three books with Him.
You might be wondering if I know there’s an app that can get me through the whole Bible in a year.
Friend, of course I do.
But I enjoy hearing and walking with the Lord. Even if it means I’m reading and rereading the same book—just to catch a whisper from Him.
Honestly, I love going at His pace through His book.
There have been seasons when I’ve wished time would stop moving—just so I could stay in that moment with Him.
But time is rebellious and won’t listen to me.
Then, there are the small notes and underlinings from my mother and grandmother that I stumble upon along the way.
Recently, I received a message from the Lord, confirmed by scripture. I found myself skimming pages for no reason—(Why? Because Jesus said I can.)
When I made it to the back of the Bible, on the inside of the cover page, my grandmother had written that very scripture.
And under it, my mom wrote: “Me too, Mom.”
With a swelled heart, pouring from my eyes, I wrote next to my mom:
“Me too, Mom — 2025.”
One Trinity God.
One Bible.
One message.
Three generations.
That’s the God I walk through the Bible with.
I encourage you—
Put the app away.
Open your hard copy.
And walk with Him too.

The 2nd and 3rd book

The second book I received from the Lord was The Epic of Eden, and the third was The Hiding Place.
The Lord constantly placed both of these books in my path.
Eventually, I got the hint!
I praise God for His persistence!
The first time I heard about The Epic of Eden was through Priscilla Shirer while watching her on a YouTube video.
I have to be honest—I haven’t completely finished reading it.
This has nothing to do with the book itself, but more with my attention span.
This book is full of insight on the culture and life within the Bible.
Did you notice it also has my intimate post-its sticking out of it?
I haven’t given up on this book—I’m just giving myself grace as I get through it.
I highly recommend this book to anyone reading the Bible. It will help you gain a better understanding of the context.
Now, The Hiding Place, on the other hand—I couldn’t put it down.
It sparked a fire in me to better understand a time period I thought I already knew something about.
So after I finished reading this book, the Lord and I dug deeper into that time in history.
I discovered many different facts I had never seen before.
When our journey ended, I had a better understanding of what happened.
He then guided me to the interview.
In the interview, Corrie Ten Boom spoke about how the Lord helped her—how He helped her extend a hand of forgiveness to a man who worked at one of the camps where she had been held.
What an amazing God we serve—
One who loves us all!
His patience,
forgiveness,
grace,
mercy,
and unfailing love—
for all His children!

The 4th and 5th books

The fourth and fifth books I received came from my baptism at my local church.
I honestly don’t recall ever being baptized in my life—not even in my youth.
My sisters told me that they had been baptized. They shared their experiences with me.
So I knew it was a step in my faith walk.
It became a step I began to envision for myself—how it would go, what it would look like.
But God had other plans.
Eventually, the thought of being baptized faded, and I told myself, “One day.”
I continued walking with the Lord.
In September 2023, He led me to Central Church.
Honestly, my first impression was: “Big—with a lot going on.”
But I didn’t stop at one service.
I knew the Lord led me there.
So I went back—again and again.
Through prayer, the Lord helped me work out many things I saw as “big.”
He also helped with other emotions that had surfaced.
After some months, He brought baptism back into focus.
I have to tell you—as an introvert, the way I was seeing them do it, my answer was:
“No way am I doing that!”
Yet again, I prayed and discussed it with the Lord.
He guided me to a place of acceptance, saying:
“Okay. Let’s do it.”
With nerves still present and still not fully understanding, I signed up.
As I awaited the big day, the Lord gave me a vision:
He was holding my hand.
Together, we were walking into the water.
On the day of, the baptism team was so kind and supportive.
They even pulled everyone together to ensure we fully understood what we were doing.
They also asked us about ourselves.
The Lord not only took time to prepare me,
but also prepared a loving group of individuals to help me walk it out.
After all His preparation, on November 11, 2023,
I publicly declared Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior.
Afterward, I received my new books—YaY!
I read some of the prayer books, but never finished.
I’m not sure why I stopped reading, either.
Probably that attention span issue I have—
but who knows, other than the Lord?
The How to Follow Jesus book was a different story.
I worked my way through it in no time at all.
It’s written in a way that, in my opinion, is understandable for all ages.
Working through it brought me excitement and better understanding of some things I had not yet learned.
I can honestly say, sitting here today—
I love Jesus.
I also love the people of this church
that once felt so big.

The 6th, 7th, and 8th

Unknowingly to me, God brought my sixth, seventh, and eighth books into my life.
They came right on the cusp of a season leading into spiritual warfare.
God often prepares us for the things that are to come.
He also heals us in layers—based on what’s doing the most harm, in my experience.
As my excitement over these books and reading them grows, I find I take the lessons and practices each one unfolds more seriously—because I know WHO is taking me down this path.
If you were to open these books, you would find all kinds of notes and highlighted areas.
Some of these notes made it off the pages and onto a mirror—written in dry erase marker.
A post-it hung around my apartment somewhere.
Some notes even inspired prayers in my life.
The sixth book the Lord presented to me was The Garden Within.
It shined a light into places I didn’t even know existed in me.
Honestly, everything I knew about abuse was in a physical sense.
I had just assumed my emotions and thoughts were just who I was.
The strawberry on the vanilla whipped topping cupcake was that I was walking through the book of Matthew with Jesus.
I’m still in Matthew—because when I hit chapter 16, we went back to the beginning.
We worked through the ins and outs of the parable of the sower.
So when it came across the page, the book had my full attention.
Along with this book, I spent time in prayer and had many conversations with Jesus.
Yes—there was also some confession and repentance.
The Lord broke some strongholds off me.
I recommend this book to ANYONE who is seeking to better understand emotional health.
I suggest reading it with prayer.

#7
The seventh book I received from the Lord was A Jewel in His Crown.
I have—and still today—struggle with wrapping my head and heart around who I am to Jesus.
Praise the Lord for His patience with me, because the Lord knows I need it daily.
This is an ongoing road I’m walking with the Lord, and He is so gracious with me.
Just recently, He had me travel backwards.
He wanted to show me something we did together.
It brought me such joy and love.
Every day I spend with Him, I get to know His heart toward me.
And I also learn the truth of my heart toward Him.
I once heard someone say:
“Even though our brain and heart are only 18 inches apart, sometimes it can take a lifetime to connect the two.”
(I probably slaughtered that quote. I’m not sure where I heard it—Better Together, maybe.)
My brain sucks everything up like a sponge.
I’m also known to get excited, have passion, or any of the other great emotions.
Still, my heart at times feels so distant from everything.
This book has played a role on the path I’m walking with Jesus.
If you feel even a little bit like me, I recommend this book to you.

#8
The eighth book the Lord gave me was Battlefield of the Mind.
The Lord had already been working with me—
He was helping me understand that not all our thoughts belong to us.
If you didn’t know… well, now you do.
That’s right—seeds can be planted by the enemy too.
My brain had been going 90-to-nothing, pondering every thought and watering them all for forty years.
Can you just imagine that forest of trees?
Praise Jesus that He does all this in layers!
I am no expert, so where am I as of today?
I’m working the muscles of my mental armor.
My go-to is scripture memorization.
It keeps me focused on God’s Word.
I use post-its—(I suggest buying a lot of these).
I highlight a passage in different colors.
For one week, I repeat one color over and over again.
I also ask the Lord what certain things mean.
Normally, by the end of the week, I have that one sentence memorized and can start with the next.
There are so many great tools out there to strengthen your mind against the enemy.
Because of all the things Jesus had already been walking me through,
this book took me to the next level.

The 9th

Book #9: The Power of a Woman’s Words
The ninth book I received is The Power of a Woman’s Words.
I found this book to be a blessing.
I am a daughter of the Lord who has a tendency to speak before I think.
I received this book’s recommendation during a Girls Night Out at my local church in the fall of 2024.
It didn’t take me long to read through it.
I even have plans to read it again.
I feel it will be beneficial as a good reminder about the weight of my words.
The season I was in while reading this book was one where what was spoken mattered more than I knew.
Alongside this book, the Lord walked me through other parts of my life—
revealing to me the power of words.
This walk wasn’t just about how my words affected the people around me—
but also about how my own words were damaging me.
There were two moments in that walk I’ll never forget.
One—
The Lord literally pulled words from my mouth,
because what I was holding onto was harming me.
The other—
I was mid-conversation, and the Holy Spirit overpowered me emotionally and closed my mouth.
There’s no telling how that looked to the person on the other end.
(I never asked, either.)
By the end of that season, I came to a place where my words would’ve brought more harm than life—
even words of politeness.
Silence became my road.
Did I complete that season perfectly?
Absolutely not.
But it’s not about how I looked or how I walked it out—
it’s about who I was obeying.
So do I recommend this book?
Yes!
And I pray you will not read it alone—
but ask the Lord to walk and read it with you.

The 10th and 11th

The 10th and 11th books I received were:
#10 – God Is Not Mad at You by Joyce Meyer
This book—I haven’t read yet.
I’m working my way back around to it.
The fall is the plan. 😉

#11 – How (Not) to Save the World by Hosanna Wong
This book had been sitting in my Amazon shopping list for some time.
Little did I know—the Lord had plans to give it to me as a gift.
And let me tell you—
He set it up so perfectly, so easily.
While attending a class at church, they did a little giveaway at the beginning—
asking fun questions with small prizes.
The question was:
“Where in the Bible is the Sermon on the Mount?”
Now, this happens to be one of my favorite parts of the Bible,
so my arm flew up—high.
This was a first for me:
I had never been so eager or confident about answering a question from a teacher.
I even did the “arm wave, pick me!” thing.
Yup. That one.
As the teacher walked toward me, mic in hand,
I was blurting the answer before he even got to me.
And my prize?
My long-awaited read.
Praise the Lord for the little blessings. 🙌

So… was the book as good as I anticipated?
Even better.
Hosanna took me on a journey—in some ways, a reflection of my own walk with the Lord.
You can hear her passion for Jesus, her humor, and even her vulnerability.
This book helps equip you with some “bumpers” for walking out how to tell people about the love of Jesus.
As someone who keeps stumbling when trying to join conversations about Him,
it was a breath of fresh air to read about someone else stumbling too.
I recommend this book to anyone trying to step out of their comfort zone, yet feeling stuck and alone.
Also—a great read for anyone who’s been sharing Jesus for years.
Sometimes we get ahead of Him…
and we need the Lord to pull on the yoke and bring us back into step.

The 12th

Book #12: Uncaged by Jud Wilhite
The 12th book is Uncaged by Jud Wilhite.
I received this book through my church.
When I first started attending, I had gone through their “First Step” class. But when they revised the class, I felt the Lord pulling me to go again.
Amazing, isn’t it? How sometimes He calls us to repeat steps we thought were already completed.
Yet if we lean on our own understanding of what’s “finished,” we might miss the new blessings He’s placed in a walk He’s calling us to repeat.
So I signed up and made it a point to attend—all four classes.
At each class, they handed out materials. But when I walked into the fourth class, there it sat—right in front of each empty chair:
The book.
Praise the Lord!
As someone who’s sat through many of Jud’s sermons, I had a hunch this book might bring some laughter. And it did—some moments made me laugh out loud.
But I found more than just laughter through this book…
I found the Lord.
With pen in hand (yes, I mark up my books—Bible not excluded 😉), I walked with the Lord and Jud through the blessings from God.
As I did, I heard the Lord calling me to notice the little blessings in my life.
Just like a lost lamb, I had wandered—looking at others as “the blessed ones.”
But when I set my eyes on the smaller things, my life shifted into a new perspective—
a perspective I call an “upgrade.”
I began to see the Lord’s hand, His movement, His nearness.
Too often, we anticipate the miracle—something loud, dramatic, part-the-sea-level.
But when was the last time you gave God real, earnest thanks for Him—for just being who He is?
I challenge you:
Sit in your room, alone.
Close your eyes.
Now ask yourself:
“Where is my God?”
Can you find Him in the silence—without a vision?
Can you hear Him in the soft sounds?
Can you feel Him?
Does your body sense His presence?
Is His presence enough?

Do I recommend this book?
Yes.
But don’t walk through it alone.
Though it’s a written book about the Lord’s blessings—
if you’re willing—the Lord can take you deeper

The 13th

Book #13 – July 2025, The Sunflower by Simon Wiesenthal.
The 13th book I received came through a recommendation from a podcast I was listening to by Dr. Anita Phillips.
At the end of her podcast, she recommended two books, and I told the Lord,
“Okay… whichever You choose, the library will have.”
So—on my first trip to the library in almost two years—
out of the two books, this was the one they had.
The libraries around here don’t even carry the other one.
I guess He was making sure I got the right one.
To date, this is the book I’m currently reading.
It’s a book about forgiveness.
To my surprise, it extends far beyond the author and his personal journey.
He didn’t stop at himself. He went further—inviting people of other religions, cultures, and races to step into his shoes and express their hearts on the journey the Lord took him on.
I’ve just made it past his story and into the first two letters.
The season I’m currently walking with the Lord is challenging in many ways—
ways that keep me on my knees and have me discovering deep, inward hurts and hidden truths.
I honestly don’t know where this is headed—
but I know Who I am following.
So I’m taking it…
one step,
one prayer,
one tear,
one word
at a time.
From what I’ve read and walked through so far,
I can honestly say—
this book and this journey are for anyone in need of truth and forgiveness